MAILBAG!!!

Oooh, and today we’ve got a doozie!

Looks like someone doesn’t like what they purchased on Craigslist. Boo hoo hoo! Let’s read on, shall we?

Hey Allie,

Had a better chance to look at the Yukon (out of the rain and the cold) and found that the fork is bent and peddle cassette is missing teeth. The bike was ridden a lot harder then represented! (+ other problems) I know a deal is a deal but, I thought I would let you both know that I would have passed if conditions on the viewing had been better....
If given the chance for refund and return, I would accept....If not, Karma works well!

Cxxxx (555) 555-1212

Gentle reader; please allow me to dissect this with a bit of explanation. First, I would never purposely mis-represent such an item. If I were going to do that I never would have agreed to compromise $100 on the price! (My desired responses are in parentheses)

Hey Allie, (Yep, that's me)

Had a better chance to look at the Yukon (out of the rain and the cold)

(It was raining and damned cold. You took it for a spin in the rain never once stopping under a store awning in the strip mall we met at to look the item over.)

and found that the fork is bent and peddle cassette is missing teeth.

(Not bloody likely. This bike was a rail-trail special that saw dirt once or twice but whimpered so badly that it was relegated back to the road. If a tooth was in fact missing on the chain ring, I'm positive the plastic chain-ring-guide would have suffered some type of damage, say...smashed into a thousand pieces. If a hunk is torn off of a metal ring, I'm sure the plastic parts wouldn't hold up either.)

The bike was ridden a lot harder then represented! (+ other problems)

( HORSEFEATHERS!!! Unless, on it's trip across the country in the moving van Sven and his circus bear snuck in one night and practiced their new act on this bike)

I know a deal is a deal but, I thought I would let you both know that I would have passed if conditions on the viewing had been better....

(Sorry bro, it had been raining ALL DAY. You drove 30 MILES IN THE RAIN to check out a $250 bike! AN ENTIRE BIKE FOR $250!

At that price it's NOT gonna say ORBEA down the side! You had my number and could have used it to say something like "hey, it's raining and I’m a dainty little flower and might melt. Let's reschedule." See, it's a weird thing, but when you get a deal off of craigslist the seller doesn't have control over the weather. That's what STORES are for. They have these cool things called ROOVES that keep the rain outside when you're inside deliberating over a product.)

If given the chance for refund and return, I would accept....If not, Karma works well!

(Well, well, well...what have we here? A threat for the Karma Payment Plan??? I ACCEPT YOUR OFFER!!!

Dear Unhappy Buyer,

I am truly sorry that you feel your purchasing experience was negative. At this time I am unable to issue a refund and take the bike back, however you'll be happy to know that as I was conjuring up this rotten little bargain and waiting to spring the full wrath of my unscrupulous dealings upon you, my car died late Thanksgiving night, after dining and drinks, 2 hours away from home with an irritated husband and a puking dog. We never made it home, and while we were foraging for newspapers to keep ourselves warm, John Denver, flying his experimental aircraft with passengers Elvis and Marylyn Monroe crashed into us leaving the dog only 1 leg and me paralyzed with the exception of my right pinky toe and ability to wiggle my ears. It was amazing yet tragic and I'm sure you can appreciate the difficulty of typing up this reply. I do hope that this makes you feel better about your purchase.)

Sincerely,

Ethyyl